It's only been cold for two days and already I'm going into winter blues syndrom. I just hate the cold. The poor horses have icicles on their eyelashes and noses. the cats have to pick up their little paws and wait a bit when they're walking, my fingers freeze no matter what gloves or mitts I have on and I HATE getting into a cold car! We had to cancel the Bowlby Christmas party because it was so cold and blowing I didn't want anyone travelling with their little kids. And at work we're remerchandising, which really means we're turninghe store upside down and moving shelves and all to different parts of the store, long hard heavy work. I just keep thinking a week and I'm in Texas, please let it come FAST

We sold Maggie this week. I had three horses, and since I can only ride one and I don't ride very often, I decided I had to make a choice. This fellow we know isn't a very good rider and he really liked Maggie, who wouldn't, they're really good horse people, his wife has ridden alot and he wanted to start so they could do it together, so, she's gone to a really good home and now I can work more with Annie and Gypsie.

life is precious

At work today we all received the very sad and disturbing news that the husband of one of our co workers had committed suicide last night. This man had a two year old little girl. Its beyond my comprehension the state someone would have to be in to feel this is the only way. My life isn't perfect, but it has some perfect in it. My children, my grandchildren, the beautiful night sky with the flood of stars, the moon, my filly, soft kittens and puppies, sisters who love you even though theirs no blood ties, my children and grandchildren, and even at its worst life is still woth living.

Remembrance Day

I had the privilege of attending three Remembrance Day services. I went to the Pass, Norma is a member of the Legion and was asked to Drive the Veterans the the various services throughout the Pass. So we attended the first one at the High School, then went to Bellevue for the Honor Guard and presentation of the Colors and 21 gun salute, then off to their home Legion for the Cenotaph Service. It brought home to me how REAL the wars were. I talked to some of these Veterans. The cold and the mud and bad food or no food. Seeing their friends blown to bits, that's not a movie, that's their memories. We're blessed with a free land because of these people. I know its very far removed from us now and further from your kids, but I think its important that they have some idea, I know here and in the Pass they had services at the schools where Veterans went in and gave presentations. I spoke with one very nice man, he's 85 and he said that they showed a video at the school but he had such a hard time watching it because he said it just hit too close to home. I'm so glad that I had this opportunity and am so thankful for these brave people and the sacrfices they made.

Sept. to Nov. I guess its about time I caught up a bit. It's just that most of the time, I work, I sleep, I work on the place. Not much else to say. But this week end we went up to Edmonton for the Canadian Finals Rodeo. Friends of ours won tickets so they asked us if we thought we could go along. Whats to think about free hotels and tickets to two performances. It was great!!
We are getting the place fixed up, Rod got the wind screen around the balcony, big improvement, we got the rail fence up along the front of the property, alot of weeds cleared out. The biggest thing left is the barn and we need young bodies to help us with that. So, it might have to wait till spring. I dressed up as a scarecrow for Halloween and won the prize at work. I'm going over to the Pass to spend tomoorow with Norma it's hard to believe that mom has been gone for 4 years.
Oh one more thing. In the finals for our cattle sorting club, which was held a few weeks ago, I CAME IN 4TH out of 24, so I was pretty pleased with myself and Maggie. We're getting a waterer put in at the arena so we can sort all winter.

Had a great time tonight. I went sorting at Ft Mcleod. Rob brought me one of his horses cuz Rod has the trailer at the lease. Her name is Tagg and we had such a good time. I trashed once but the other 5 runs were all good runs, we even had one with 10 cattle in 1:24 minutes. We have such a good bunch of people that come out everyone is so friendly. Its just a really good time. The only problem is that 4:30 comes really fast when you go to bed this late and I'm so up about my runs tonight that I'm not tired. I'll be paying the price tomorrow.

july 6, I guess that was qutie awhile ago. I'd better catch up a bit. What I have been doing most of is trying to get my yard cleaned up and fixed up. Its coming but we have so many weeds that its a never ending battle. Last weekend we went with two other couples to the Great Canadian Barn Dance. It went through the afternoon with music, the a roast beef supper and music till midnight. We all had a really good time. It was nice to do something different. Rod went back to work today, so I' waiting for him to call and let me know how the day went. I went over to Dawns for supper last night and she had the YUMMYEST dessert and it was simple to make. It was her apple dumplings that I think she put on her blog, TRY THEM you'll love them. Trevor and I made a date to go to High School Musical 3 when it comes out. It'll be great fun. I've started planning the Bowlby Christmas Party> I can't believe Christmas is coming so quickly. Speaking of which I need ideas for kids and adults for Christmas, because left to my own you gotta know I screw up. Dawn said both the Jones and Hamons were getting WII, is that how ya spell it? Anyway if I should get accesories please let me know SPECIFICALLY what. Anyway gotta run

I'm in misery all the time lately I can't find an allergy medicine that will help me this year. I've tried four so far. Today I'm off to get Aerius, someone told me that works really well for them. So, I'll give it a try. Every night I come home from work and spend the evening with a cold cloth on my eyes so stop from scratching them out of my head. HEH, Jenie you had something for your eyes some drops, doyou remember the name or are you the smart one and still use it. I forgot, last year wasn't so bad so I didn't need much. If you have the name pleas let me know. never mind I'm gonna call ya.

Happy soggy july 1st. I guess its my fault we got this FLOOD!! I really wanted to mow my grass today, now by the time it dries up I'll have to hay it instead. I did get my new patio table and chairs put up just before the downpour and I found Max the cat, he was lost. So I guess the day wasn't totally a wash.

Last Monday Rod was thrown from a horse and broke his neck in two places. They took him to Calgary did surgery on thurs and today I brought him home. He's doing really well, hasn't taken pain killers all day. This was the weekend I was supposed to go and spend with Krista in Whitecourt so I'm really bummed out about it. Dawn came up with me to Calgary when I went to visit Rod. Thanks to her I didn't spend my time wondering lost or finding my way out of places I shouldn't have been. It was really nice to have her company.

I played hookey from work today, I never even played hookey from school, now I'm a diliquent. I just really needed some time to get my head together. I stained most of my deck but its ugly so I have to redo it tomorrow. Gypsy was jumpin arounfdyesterday and slipped in the wet grass, I think she twisted her hip or pulled a muscle or something, she won't hardly put any weight on it and she just lies down most of the time. I'm gonna ask the experts tomorrow at work and see if there's anything I can do for her. The sunshine is finally here. I love it

I'm tired of being sick and I'm tired of the rain. I thought Saturday I was getting better but today my head is so stuffed I think it's gonna explode. We also had Rod sister, husband and mom for dinner cuz I was feeling good yesterday. They were very nice and understood why I looked like crap. And to top it off its raining again today. I'm so tired of the rain, I did go and look at Dawns rugs yesterday. They are sooooooo nice. That expansion is going to be wonderful.

THE BRANDING was today and I loved it! I've decided that I have to enjoy all the time I can out at the Ranch because one of these years its gonna be sold and that'll be great for mom and dad but oh so sad for those of us who visit and play not often enough. I can't post any pics cuz Dawn took my camera home to download the pictures, but, I'm counting on both Dawn and Tina to post some great pictures.

I think at my stage in life birthdays are not so much to celebrate growing older, as they are to celebrate being alive and having people around you who love you and support you. Cindy phoned me from the hospital this morning to wish me a happy birthday, she was in for Chemo again, her second round this month, she used to go every two years but she doesn't look at it as losing the battle but having beaten it this far. She is amazing in her positive attitude and she wanted to make sure I had someone to spend my birthday with. Thanks Dawn for the great supper and mostly for the visit and I guess I should say thanks again to Dawn and Krista for the PINK gum boots, they certainly make a statement. I bought myself a new pair of really really soft leather riding gloves for my birthday they're beautiful. I think I'll break them in at the branding on Saturday.

this is my yard today. notice the little grass UNDER the water, I've spent the last weeks diligently watering that grass so it would grow, wouldn't it be funny if it got killed by water now, not funny haha but funny sit down and cry about it. AND notice my trees too, they don't like very much water, THATS WHY I GOT THEM!!!!

had a super weekend with Michael and Jenie and family. Those kids say and do some of the funniest things. We watched High School Musical, of my gosh they know all the songs and they dance to it too. The girls do really well, I guess boys just don't get the whole dance thing cuz it looked painful. But I had a fantastic time. I just can't make it so long between visits. I miss too much. Oh one thing that they did, after church on Sunday they had a potluck. They do it I think every 4 months. It is just such a super idea eveyone stays and visits and eats yummy food, I love potlucks and the kids all play around, a great time for fellowshipping.

its 10:30 I should be fast asleep but here I sit wide awake. I came home from work today with a killer headache, I didn't get any sleep last night my mind was too busy trying to accept things, so, today I knew I'd get a headache, lack of sleep, number 1 reason for headaches. So when I got home I thought I'd be smart and take Tylenol instead of excedrin, waited an hour NOTHING but dopeyness, so then I thought maybe just 1 excedrin will take care of it, waited an hour NOTHING, so desparate for relief I downed two excedrin, headaches gone but I'm up for awhile yet. But on the up side I got my house all dusted, swept, vacuumed and floors scrubbed. I'm exfoliated, waxed, tanned and moitruized, wash is done and lunch is made for tomorrow. Oh and thanks to Dawn and Krista you can all meet Gypsy. So, now I'm gonna go play cradle of Rome for awhile and maybe read for some time.

meet gypsy

I went out tonight and spent some time with Annie and her baby tonight and just watched and saw the love that is there, its so pure and simple, she loves her baby and no one is gonna some between them. Maggie stands at the fence and is always trying to sniff at the baby but Annie just squeals and chases her off. I think I will call the baby gypsy, thanks Krista, I think its a real good name for her. I'm exhausted and have a headache gonna try to get some sleep. love to you all

This is the hardest Mothers Day I have ever had. I listened in church this morning to talks on what makes a mother. All the sacrificing we do that really isn't sacrificing because there is nothing more important or precious to us than our children. I watched this afternoon as Annie protected and shielded her new filly. When maggie would come near the fence annies ears would lay back and she'd squeal her protest and quickly herd that baby away. It's natural to protest when someone comes to take over your sacred position.

Rod brought babe and mom home tonight. I got some pictures and Gary helped me put one somewhere on facebook, but, I havene't figured out yet how to get some on here, but, I'll keep trying. She is beautiful , solid color except for a diamond on her forehead and a little snippet of white on her nose. She's pretty shy yet but she let me pet her rump. Tomorrow I'll spend lots of time with her and do alot of imprinting. She is so wonderful. I went and got Terina right after work and brought her over. She was the first kid to get to pet her and she is oh so excited then Rod and I took her to supper at Montanas then took her home. She really just wanted to stay her with the filly, not interested in going anywhere. Its so fun to see how really interested she is in the horse and everything that is going on with her. I hope she can have a big part in training this little filly.

I got some very exciting news tonight. I was at the show with Rob andCindy and Rod phoned. Early last week he'd been bucked off Annie, our very gentle mare. He couldn't figure out why she was so antsie and out of sorts lately. This morning he found out, she had a baby!!!!! We didn't even know she was expecting, she must have been pregnant when we bought her. Anyway we have a little filly, she's palamino just like her mama. Rods bring her home on Friday. So I need suggestions for a name so I can guide Terina in the naming of this little darling, cuz we all know how good Terina is at names. Oh, the show we went to was Made of Honor. cute show a real chick flick, now its 10 to 10 and I'm off to bed to dream of my new little babe.

I just finished reading Kristas blog and she made me think of the country smells and I really do love all of them. Tonight I finally got to burn some of our ditch. I even like that smell as long as I can shower before bed. Its not a really nice smell to sleep with. And thanks again to Tina for the suggestion to plant a little grass at a time. I think I could keep a litttle watered, it'll probably take all summer but at least I'd have grass eventually. I had to work today, one Saturday out of 5 we have to work so I'm really tired tonight cuz I burned till after dark, it was kinda neat. AND I finally got a yard light. Tyler was down last weekend and he put one on the barn for me. Wrong color bulb, I like the warm yellow lights but thats easily changed

Well, I think the sad fact is I'll never have grass. We seeded last fall but the winter was so open and the wind so wild and we flooded from the barn mishap, so, we reseeded last week , then it snowed and that was great, but, the wind again and I can't keep the ground damp for the seed to germinate because we have the water pressure of the squirt gun, a really really small squirt gun, so now I'm trying to think of alternatives for grass. Anyone got any good ideas??

Well, I couldn't fix the USB thing on my computer so I took it in to Computer Trends and the nice man there fixed it for me. I brought it home hooked it all up BY MYSELF, still waitng for something to start smokin'. Then my Norton said it needed to be renewed so I set on my merry way to downloading that. Well, I'm not sure what NORTON did but I couldn't get the internet, so a call to my internet provider USELESS, then a call to Krista, Garys out of town, and between the two of us I'm once again online. Besides all that excitment not too much happening here just waiting for the snow to melt and things to dry up so we don't get lost in the MUD. I fised the fence crawling babies. I got wire ties and fixed the whole fence so if they get out now they're houdinis. We sold our 5th wheel, after living in it for six months we're not anxious to do it any more.

Well, Rods back. He had the assessment and decided that it wasn't a good idea because he would still have to have glasses for reading and such so he said "no". You mihgt not have to adjust for too long Krista to me working if there are too many more days like today. It was SO frustrating. I'll give it awhile but I'm not staying if I'm not happy

its snowing, not a little but alot!! Huge snowflakes, which makes it pretty and we really do need the moisture, but it would be SO much better if I'd got my lawn reseeded before it did this. I wanted to get it all done last weekend, but, Rod, said oh no lets wait till NEXT weekend. Now all this wonderful moisture is NOT going to makes my lawn grow BECAUSE I HAVEN:T PLANTED IT YET. Very frustrating. Rod is going to get Lazer surgery on his eyes on Thurs. I put my appointment off till Jan I didn't want to start a new job just to take a week off at the busiest time of the year so I'll wait.

today was just crazy I went into town this morning for a LASARA mock search with the LCC criminal justice students, let me tell ya if some of these people are gonna be our future Police officers we're in trouble. Anyway after that I was just gonna run to HOme Depot pick up somelumber that we needed and zip home to spend a wonderful day just building and work around the place. WELL, two and a half hours it took me at home depot, Talk about inept, lazy, clueless employees, I was so frustrated by the time I finally excaped that NUTHOUSE it has colored the rest of my day. But thankfully after supper we took a walk around the place, played with the calves and Maggie, it was a goreuos evening, one of those that you don't want to end because it is CALM and sunny a mild and you liesten to the birds and see a rabbit so now I feel alot better. Thank heaven for Nature she is a wonderful healer.

Work is getting better I did two displays today that really look pretty good. The Hamons came over for supper today. Well, actually Dawn asked me over to their place for supper but I suggested they come over here and we could roast hotdogs AND mostly so we could play with Maggie. I feel so guilty about leaving her alone all the time. Last night I was out working on the fence and she paced along the fence whinnying at me the whole time. So , she had a good time tonight with all the kids paying attention to her.

Friday afternoon I picked up Terina and brought her out here to ride Maggie. She did really well, we got helmets for the kids so I feel good about letting her ride by herself in the arena, #1 she can't go too far from me and #2 if she does take a tumble her head will be okay. She trotted a little by herself and we had a great time. After, we put the rest of the boards on the firepit shelter, she used the power drill and put the screws in. She spent the night, so, we had to do our fingernails and stay up ridiculously late. Like 9 o'clock!!!! Now I would really like to put some pics on here of Terina riding and fence building and nails, BUT,(if its not one thing it another) my camera has quit working. It hasn't been really goood since it got wet at Sea World(we didn't know we were gonna get SOAKED!!!)Gary, being oh so helpful suggested that maybe electronics didn't like water so much, so, now I'm gonna have to find someone to solve the problem or invest in a new camera. Today I just went to see Darlene in the hospital, she will probably find out tomorrow whats gonna happen.

update, just for Krista. I'm exhausted tonight. This back working for a living is hard!!. The only good thing about this job is that when I get home I can forget about it until tomorrow. Everyone been quite uptight the last few days cuz a big wig from Cal+gary was coming. He came today and I think everyone survived. Didn't bother me I didn't even know which one he was. There are so many different people in the store right now because they have the whole crew from the Pincher Creek store at our store training. They will be with us until the long weekend in may so the store is a little crowded. But things were ok today I did get on the computer and learned a few things, so its all coming slowly. Darlene, a friend of mine who also works at UFA was taken to the hospital today by ambulance she has something really wrong with her bowels, so I was at the hospital for quite awhile after work so by the time I got home I just went and said HI to Maggie and came in. I had to put up the verticals for our living room tonight and do some laundry. I did go gor a ride last night Maggie was so happy to get out she was a perfect lady for our whole ride. It was really nice. Thats about it for the update, its 8:30 I have to wait for one more load of laudry then its beddy bye time for me

today was much better than yesterday. First thing I went to my boss and very calmly told him how I felt about yesterday, he agreed, so now I'm on 6-2:30 for the time being. I also told him that I would take my turn at the ugly shift but that I thought the other 4 in that dept needed to take a turn too. They go on a 6 week schedule so you wouldn't get that shift very often once every 24 weeks. Anyway so today went alot better I'm a little more comfortable and the people are pretty fiendly and helpful. When i got home I had to spend some time with Maggie but before I could do that I had to go and get Marshmallow back from the neighboring field. She had crawled through the fence so I had to lure her back UNDER the fence then fix the fence hopefully it will hold I guess I'll know tomorrow afternoon.

well it was a disappointing day today. I was supposed to go in at 8:00 today , then start 6 tomorrow, but when Dave and I were going over scheduling he informed me that thing had changed and I was to start at 9:30 and go till 6. I asked how long that would go on and he said it was permanant and asked if it was a problem and said ya its a problem there are four other people in the dept and I thought every one should take there turn so he said he would look into something that was a little more fair. Not only that, EVERYONE from my dept left at 2:30 today INCLUDING my supervisor, no what she said to me as she was leaving, Well find yourself something to do. How was I to do that when I don't even know what to find. I'd been there for 6 hours and 4 of it had been in front of a computer doing prerequisite folders. They need a merchandisier on till 6 in case someone needs to find something from the back or a price. WHAT A JOKE!!! I have know idea how to find prices or PRODUCT. So I'm very frustarated tonight. I didn't get home till 7 had to look after the horse and cats, then feed myself something, now its almost time for bed. Just not a good day. Rod did get off to Lomond so I guess that good.

Since this a a journal as well as news I feel like I have to put in this entry.
I watched a movie tonight about a young girl who had been abused by her father. I have been through the counselling and I know in my head that the blame is not on the child. But she asked the same questions I asked, why didn't I say something, why didn't mom know something. Why me?? He told me that he didn't really hurt me, but he not only hurt me but my whole family. I couldn't cope, I went into a deep dark place that I couldn't get out of . It ruined my marriage, hurt my children, I tell myself IF ONLY so many times and also WHY, why couldn't I be born in a good LDS family I love the church and life in the church I wanted so badly to have a mormon family when I was growing up with FHE and the Priesthood and dads who loved their kids and moms who were there for you. What did I do that was so bad that I had to be born into that. I try to remember only the good from when I was little but sometimes its just dark and the bad comes back to haunt you. The drinking, and fighting, the beatings and abuse, you were never allowed to say anything mom would just say it was no ones business and to just keep quiet, I wish so much that I hadn't listened to her. I don't blame her, thats the way she was raised and was all she knew.
I couldn't find all the answers I need with my counsellor or on my own so now I'm looking where I probably should have looked in the first place, in the Gospel, not necessarily the Church, because the church is people, but the Gospel is the love of Christ so I'm searching for answers there.

New day I'm feeling so much better, no wind, just don't say it too loudly. Rods in Sask so I'm gonna work around here probably get some racks and stuff built in the workshop. I started walking again this AM, walked for 1/2 an hour I'm not sure how far just down the road around and back across the field. It felt good Baxter came with me.

Just when I start to think that I really like my home and I can be very happy here, we get a HURRICANE. I can't even open my door because the wind is blowing SO HARD!!! I generally don't mind the wind but this is RIDICULOUS!!
Going back to yesterday. It was really fun Dawn and family came over and we hunted for eggs, and colored eggs and fingernails and ate and played games. I made the boys each a tools belt so Trevor wanted to find screws to do up or undo very fun day. Today Rod is off to Sask again, I thought I'd stay home and get some work done here but since I CAN"T EVEN GET OUTSIDE I'M JUST FRUSTRATED!!!!

I am pretty tired tonight. We built our back deck today. It's 8X8 and looks pretty good. I was going to do alot of burning tonight along the ditches but I'm just too tired. Tomorrow Dawn and family are coming for dinner and We're going to go get Rods mom too. So, we'll have an easter egg hunt here. Dawn brought over a bunch of plastic eggs so I will hide themin the morning then we'll color eggs and paint our finger nails. I'll try to post some pictures

I started volunteering at Hearts Haven Ranch today. It's a new place by Raymond thats gonna give horse riding lessons and needs volunteers to help. So, right now Shes training the volunteers. Most everyone is a teenager, actually everyone but me. 99% of them haven't ridden before. So, I was leading one young lady today, she was bareback, something spooked the horse, she bolted forward a bit and the young lady went off the back onto the ground. Yup, these are the kids who are going to be TEACHING, should be interesting. I'm doing so I can learn so I can teach my grandkids the right way.

well i went through two folders today at UFA one on UFA orientation and the other one WHMIS wrote the tests for both and passed. You have to get 100% on all of these "folders" I have two more to complete the day I start before they will put me on the floor. One on transporation of dangerous goods(tdg) why I have know idea I won't be transporting anything and I'm not sure what the other one is about. Then there are 5 more "folders" that I have to complete in my first week there. Then it's an ongoing learning agenda, the more "folders" or topics you complete the better your reviews will be. But all that brain work has given me a headache that I'm trying to get rid of with Tylenol instead of Excedrin so I can sleep tonight so far it hasn't worked

more summer at the lake

ok here is another picture at the cabin this summer. We're vegging watching TV. Do you have this one Krista? Thanks Krista for removing whatever you helped me remove. No Jenie, the nail stuff is actual paint with little nibs that look like to old fashion pens. A little hard to use at first but I think with practice it'll be very fun . My Horse Maggie isn't feeling very good lately. I'm not sure wahts wrong, but with all the flu going around in people I think maybe thats waht she has too. We're finally getting dried up enough that we started getting the boards put on the side of the barn so I should be able to paint it within the month. Barn red of course.

thanks Krista, now I can put pictures on my blog. This is FUN at the Texas State Fair

getting started

I thought this would be a good way to keep in touch with everyone and also maybe journalize for me. I just talked to Mom Bowlby Scott finally got in touch with them. I can't even imagine having one of my kids not talk to me for years. It was such a heartbreak for mom and dad. I count my blessing everyday that I have such great kids.
I got myself a job. I start at UFA as a merchanizer on March31. I'll be going in before then to write the WIMHS exam and other testing. Rod got a job in Lomond for the summer as a lease rider.
I have to learn how to put pictures on here because I love pictures from all of you. I went to the Home and Garden Trade show and bought a nail decorater kit. It is gonna be so fun I'm taking it over to Dawns so the girls and I can play and decorate our nails.